Tennis Staff Multiway

The Tennis Staff Multiway is an ongoing(?) tennis chain that began on May 26, 2009. The concept behind it was for it to be exclusive match played only by the Tennis Staff on the original Youchew Forums. Originally started as a giant multi-way match between the active staff of the time, it soon become part of a "rite of passage" tradition, where new rounds largely became made by the most recent additions to the staff as sort of a celebration of their promotion. Even so, any member of the staff past or present can volley, with second volleys being contributed by RAKninja and strong414bad. The match has continued following Youchew's closure, extending to the Tennis Staff of YTPMania, with the most recent round being by dani_phantump.

"A legendary tennis match as old as time. Or, at least, as old as 2009. This decade long match and counting has long been written in stone by the Fucks of old and through successive generations of time and staff turnover. It weaves a multi-directional, evolving narrative of the warrior CHEN, born from the serve of the fabled Moogle, who has lived to survive 15 grueling tennis rounds of absurdity, complexity, humor, music, and NINJAS, which have been and continue to have been served only by those who have been presently or previously chosen by the Golden Bunny Breasted Racquet of Servitude, now represented equally by the Silver Racqueted Shield of the Knights of Justice (“We Don’t Care Who You Are, We’re Ready To Meet You”). CHEN The Warrior is themselves never seen, but their immediately recognizable Battle Cry has pierced the heavens and cut through every tennis round gauntlet they have found themselves faced with, aided with by the awesome strength of their mighty weapon, The Incredible Laser Sword. Truly, nothing can stop The Warrior CHEN. In short, This is The Tennis Fuck Story. A theoretically endless multi-way in which only cafe staff may volley."

-dani_phantump, in the OP of the YTPMania continuation thread October 22, 2019

Layout

The match is your average chain, however many of the in-jokes and references pertain to the history of the staff themselves. Rounds are sometimes claimed in advance, and members can claim as many rounds as they want; however usually they only do one or two to allow space for others to participate, whether incoming or otherwise.

Originally the match was planned to go to about 30 total rounds, with a proposed volleying order being "Moogle vs. Crash2991 vs. RAKninja vs. theHappyFungus vs. Emperor Ing vs. RabbitSnore vs. strong414bad vs. Gamebop vs. MycroProcessor vs. DaftPunkYoshi vs. NS2". While NS2 showed enthusiasm for contributing to this match, he never ended up making a Round 11 like originally planned, which eventually became RAKninja's second volley. Almost every round that has been submitted to the match since (with the exception of strong414bad's Round 14) has been by a newly added member of the Tennis Staff.

Rounds

Click here for the complete match playlist. RabbitSnore's round 6 is missing.

Round 1

"What, you want me to play with your tail?", by Moogle

Moogle's nearly 5 minute serve, uploaded May 26, 2009, utilizes many different sources associated with the different members of the active Tennis Staff at the time of its making, along with many of Moogle's usual stylistic flourishes. These include:

Touhou Sources (Moogle)
Norm Augustinus (TheHappyFungus)
Ninja: Silent Assassin (RAKninja and Emperor Ing)
Final Fantasy X (Moogle)
Bono's World AIDS Day Promo (possibly RabbitSnore)
Kukori Es Kotkoda (Gamebop)
Ralph Bakshi's Lord of The Rings(1978)(Emperor Ing)
Higurashi When They Cry (NS2 and theHappyFungus)
The Chrono Trigger Anime pilot (Crash2991)
Metal Gear Solid (NS2)
Myst (MycroProcessor)

Also included is a segment containing much of the original conradslater vs. Misselaineous10 match sped up and treated with various color effects. In respect to the rest of the match's company, the serve edits all of these different sources in a mostly classic-based humor style, to leave room for any directions desired to be taken.

Round 2

"Want Me to Play With the Very Fabric that is Your Life?", by Crash2991

Crash's Round 2, uploaded very soon after the serve (exact date uncertain), cuts out a good portion of the original source pool, preferring to focus just on largely Norm Augustinus, the Ninja: Silent Assassin Footage, the Chrono Trigger anime, Higurashi and much of Moogle's source representation, singling out the CHEEEEEN at a notable moment where an actor in an unknown Blaxploitation film performs a judo chop on another's neck. The line "I'M GONNA KILL YOU LIKE I KILLED YOUR WIFE" is repeated from the serve, and an anime depiction of Adolf Hitler from Lupin III appears for the first time very briefly. After the brief Gato's Theme interlude from the Chrono Trigger anime is shown, the full song from the original game plays over footage of a black preacher giving a sermon to a mostly empty church, presumably from another Blaxploitation film. The round ends with a brief coda following the THE END title card, with "EE-EE-EE-EE....BURRR-?" over Ninja Silent Assassin footage, immediately followed by a brief clip of Lupin smiling mischievously.

Round 3

"PLAY WITH ME AND EARN SILVER FABRIC", by RAKNinja

With the previous 2 rounds being noted for their long-ended runtime, RAKninja posted Round 3 on June 1, 2009, saying "I fixed that, sorry", with a run time of just over a minute. Beginning immediately by mirroring and slowing down the "anime Hitler" face, much of the video is dominated by Gato's Theme from Chrono Trigger and the addition of Dr. Rockso from Metalocalypse, which serves to represent and acknowledge the existence of Nuthead, the only other first generation Tennis Staff member who never participated. Like the rounds before it, it continues the usage of CHEEEEEEN from the serve, reversing it and stretching it out for the first time in the match, concluding with "I'M GONNA KILL YOU LIKE I KILLED [COCAAAAAAAINE]". RAK's Round 3 remains today as the earliest video of the match to exist as its original upload.

Round 4

"Win Silver Tiger; Play Snares Now!!", by theHappyFungus

Round 5

"Orcs Play Silver Snares without a Care", by EmperorIng

A gleeful energy pervades the course of Emperor Ing's Round 5, uploaded June 24, 2009, as he proceeds to immediately edit over the "Anime Hitler" (which makes brief reappearances across the entire video) and introduce many of his signature sources into the match. The most significant new addition is the Rankin-Bass adaption of The Hobbit(1977), namely a song from the film which includes the lines:

Sleep will ease your mind,
with the dawn you'll find....problems

At one point the video freeze frames on a frame of Gandalf making what looks to be a perplexed expression, referred to by Ing as the "Gandalf Stare". Also added into the video are mostly unedited clips from the 1985 anime film Space Transformers(which shares an executive producer in the Godfrey Ho Ninja films with Joseph Lai), utilized largely to exploit its legendarily corny English dub ("YES WELL YOU KNOW MY SISTER COMES IN HERE ALMOST EVERY DAY WHATS THE PROOOBLEMM").

Round 6

"The Thumbnail of this Video Only Tells Half the Tale", by RabbitSnore, is currently MIA as of September 2024.

Rabbit's Round 6, uploaded July 9, 2009, is notable for being edited with his trademark style of picture-in-picture layering, and for introducing Sonic The Hedgehog(OVA), one of Rabbit's signature sources, into the match's pool. Among notable moments are Tails' line "Oh Sonic, thank you!" with the frame proceeding to zoom in on Sonic winking at Tails with loud and distorted audio, along with Tails yelling "You're No HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!" The original upload was viewable until about early 2010, and then able to be viewed unlisted in the original Youchew thread from January 2013 until October 2019, when RabbitSnore's youtube account was subject to seemingly random automatic deletion by Youtube due to none of the videos being public and the account presumably being inactive for a long stretch of time. A saved copy of this round by anyone who has it remains highly sought after to make the match complete once again.

Round 7

"The Video's Thumbnail Tells Tales as James Earl Jones Reads Pi.", by Strong414bad

strong414bad's Round 7, originally uploaded July 13, 2009, adds in Hotel Mario and James Earl Jones counting to 10 on Sesame Street, the latter whom, true to the videos title, does proceed to recite 9 digits of pi interspersed throughout the response (3.14159265). CHEEEEEN is heard over a zoom in onto Mario's nose and over a screenflipping of the "Gandolf Wizard Stare", and the "sleep will ease your mind" song is repeated over the word "problems", increasing in volume to the point where James Earl Jones reciting 2 and 6 is only barely audible. As the second WMM response of the match, much of the editing is simplistic yet effective, with many repetitions, stutters and and drastic speed ups of the previous round that were well received by the other participants.

Round 8

"I don't know what Tales this Thumbnail tells", by GameBop

Round 9

"Your video's thumbnail tells the story of a duck who's name is Alfred Kwak.", by MycroProcessor

Round 10

"Stories Of A Duck Only Bring Up Nothing More Than Happiness", by DaftPunkYoshi

Round 11

"I'VE GOT A HAPPY STORY TO TELL", by RAKninja

Round 11, uploaded May 29, 2010, serves to be the first second response made to the match made by one of its members. It features a much more experimental style compared to RAK's previous contribution, stating in the video's description "I am very rusty." Beginning with a clip from Star Trek: The Original Series of Kirk exclaiming "I'M LOSING COMMAND.....IM LOSING THE ENTERPRISE...", It features his attempt to create a "3d rotating tornado of picture in picture" using the 9's from DaftPunkYoshi's round, and otherwise very minimally editing it between blocks of blank space and the addition of footage from Dolemite(1975)("DOLEMITE MOTHER FUCKER YOU-") The round ends with a clip from the 1995 comedy film The Jerky Boys, where Johnny B. asks Kamal "you think these fucking cocks can hold us?" while holding a rope of linked sausages next to a window. This is insofar the only round of the chain not to include CHEEEEEEN in some way.

Round 12

"I'VE NEVER HEARD A HAPPY STORY BEFORE", by ChrisGendo

Round 13

"TELL ME THE TENNIS FUCK STORY", by AshcrementVII

Round 14

"The Tennis Fuck Story", by Strong414bad

Round 15

"John Lemon's Fuck Stpry", by TheChutley

Round 16

"Michael Jacksonville's Funk Narrative", by theFXexpert

Round 17

"NOW IT'S TIME TO GET FUNKY", by mrdoognoog

Round 18

"The Funk of Christ, Or the Beat of Kurosawa's Island of Magical Tennis Dreams", by dew

Round 19

Spot claimed by VidTens443, but remains unfinished.

Round 20

Spot claimed by Metroid998.

Round 21

Spot claimed by GameBop.

Round 22

Spot claimed by MycroProcessor.

Round 23

Spot claimed by Zekii.

Future Rounds

GameBop and MycroProcessor have claimed rounds 21 and 22, in reference to the puzzle game Alida. However, these rounds have not been reached yet so they have yet to happen. Mycro's retirement also makes this a bit more challenging to see through.